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Halloween is one of those holidays which I still don’t celebrate, but much like Christmas and the 4th of July, I more or less go along with it because it’s the path of least resistance and because the celebrations usually provide some entertainment value.

Personally, I prefer the fun aspect of Halloween over the scary angle.

I don’t do the haunted house thing because I don’t particularly like to be scared.  I don’t like people jumping out and stunning me, nor do I want to be touched by strangers unless they are exceptionally attractive females between the ages of 20-30.

I am also very much not a fan of blood-and-guts gore.

I watched the movie “Saw II” over the weekend, and I turned my head away several times and yelled “What kind of twisted person wants to see this s**t”?  I was called a female reproductive organ a few times, but I’m sorry … I just don’t get the appeal.

I’m also not a huge fan of boxing, professional wrestling, MMA, or anything which evokes blood for the sake of entertainment.

When you grow up around real violence, I think one of two things happens:  You either get turned on to it in some weird way, or it repulses you when you get old enough to realize that you’ve been exposed to some pretty messed up things.  I’m in the latter group.  I doubt coroners get off on gory movies either.

Even though the building across the street gives away great crack, my neighborhood is not exactly Trick-or-Treat friendly.  This being the case, I took the sprogs to someplace that was.

As much as I dislike concepts like Town Square, I can’t use this reason to deny others the indulgence of delusion.  This faux-town is the site of my kid’s favorite playground, and they have a lifetime to become misanthropes.  Who am I to rush the process?

When we got to the Square for the “Safe Streets” candy begging event, it was absolutely packed.  Just completely overrun by sprogs and their parents who were standing in inordinate lines to get free sugar.  This seemed like a waste of time as each line was probably 10-15 minutes long.

It wasn’t so much a trick-or-treating experience as it was a Disneyland-esque “stand in line and wait” experience.  It also took about 20 minute to find a parking spot, and there were probably 100 cars circling the lot all looking for an open space at any given time.

Kudos to the property and the stores for participating, but when half of the Vegas Valley brings their kids to the same spot at the same time, it will devolve into a clusterf…

After getting candy from one or two places, it was decided that the whole endeavor was more trouble than it was worth.  We could blow $20 on candy the day after Halloween in stores and have enough to last the year, so the candy begging stopped.  Instead, we decided to go Downtown.

Why hang out in a faux-city and beg for treats when you can go to a real one and get 99 cent chocolate covered bananas?

Into the Porsche we went and headed to Fremont.

Once there, I was surprised to find that it was not crowded at all.  At least not by Fremont standards.  There have been weeknights during the Summer of 69 theme with two or three times more people.

I walked up the canopy, my costumed kids still in tow, and we decided to take a seat outside of Mermaids so that I could go inside and buy all kinds of diabetes-inducing crap for Halloween treats.

Kids are not allowed inside the property, so I had to go on a recon mission to procure the vile substances.  As I was ready to go head in, one of my kids said “here, you can use this”.  She had a couple dollar bills in her hand.

Just then, an older man and woman stopped where we were talking, exclaimed “oh, they’re sooooo cuuuuute”, and the man gave each of them a dollar bill.

While I quizzically protested saying “Oh no, that’s okay”, another lady walked up and gave them each another dollar.

WTF???

People on Fremont Street were handing my kids dollar bills for being in costume.  I am not kidding.

I was embarrassed, and each time it happened I would try to discourage it, but the people doling out the dollars seemed to really be enjoying it … so I eventually just gave in and thanked them profusely.

It wasn’t only money, but as we would pass stands, vendors would run out and hand them little trinkets, bags, or beads, and when we finally got home they had a fistful of dollars and all kinds of souvenirs.

People asked for them to pose for photos at least 20 times, and all of the attention was overwhelming … yet fun.

See, I told you that real cities beat faux cities.

Suffice to say that this is the kind of thing that could “only happen in Vegas”© I really don’t think you could get this experience anyplace else on an organic, unplanned level.

Needless to say, the sprogs want to go back again next year.  To Fremont that is.  They seem more than willing to cede Town Square to the soccermoms from Summerlin.

Thankfully, Fremont Street is a whopping five minutes from Rexville, so after the kids stuff I was able to quickly return and engage in my own favored Halloween ritual.  Tailspotting.

A universal truth about Halloween is that most women use the day as an excuse to dress like whores, and far be it from me to be unappreciative.  For some reason, there were also an inordinate amount of men dressed as women.  Perhaps it is just more accurate to say that on Halloween … people feel more comfortable being themselves.

Just about everyone was more than happy to pose for photos, although I would be remiss if I did not note that the casino costume ladies were panhandling in full-force.

Every time I pointed a camera in the direction of the Mermaids or the various other ladies standing outside of properties, they were quick to yell to me “We work for tips!”.

On this night, paying these ladies for photos would have been like buying sand at the beach.  There were already hundreds of other people in equally interesting costumes, and on this night … the casino women didn’t stand out all that much.

I don’t want to berate the point, but the panhandling outside of casinos by its female employees is getting worse, and I hope they can get a hold on it before it turns too many people off.  The casinos need to pay the girls to stand outside so that they don’t shake down tourists for money.  It’s getting to be like Tijuana.

Anyway, for the remainder of the night I hung out under the canopy and in casinos, dropped a few dollars on the tables, and just generally enjoyed the scenery.

I remained surprised at the overall lack of turnout.  There were far more people vying to get free candy at Town Square than there were just hanging out and enjoying themselves Downtown.  This may just be another sign of the economic times.

The people who were there all seemed to be greatly enjoying themselves, however, and that’s the important thing.

Having spent many Halloweens on The Strip, and finally one on Fremont, I would probably have to call Fremont the winner.

In my opinion, the pedestrian-friendly nature of the area, the videos blaring overhead, the dealer costumes, and the overall vibe beats the two mile walk up Las Vegas Boulevard.  While any individual casino on The Strip is probably more elaborate in and of itself, it’s nice to be able to visit a dozen properties fairly easily.

Not only that, but if you can borrow someone’s kids for a few hours, it’s also a great way to make some extra income.

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