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Speaking of catering to clientele from Eastern Asia, the Bellagio has officially unveiled its Chinese New Year display.

This is the “Year of the Tiger” on the Chinese calendar, and for those of you who do not understand Asian customs, it means that three tigers and two small chipmunks will copulate on your front lawn on the second Saturday of every month throughout 2010.

Don’t believe me?

Find the nearest Chinese person and ask them.  They’ll gladly confirm this absolute fact.

While the last 4-5 years have been extraordinarily crowded in the Chinese New Year exhibit, even on weekdays, it was pretty sparsely populated this time around.  Our friends from the Far East had a much larger contingency in town over the Christmas weekend.

On my stroll through the conservatory today, I was the recipient of a large number of dirty looks.

“But Rex, you are so charming and have such a pleasant aroma … I can’t imagine anyone giving you a dirty look under any circumstance.”

Well, thanks.  I appreciate that.

Despite your clear and accurate assessment of me, however, I did rub a few people the wrong way.

Sometimes I attach myself to a joke, and refuse to let it go. This results in my ruining a perfectly good joke (by the way, did you hear that I got a Porsche?  Ask me about it!) into the ground until it becomes annoying.  Hell, I’ve been known to run jokes into the ground that were never funny in the first place.

It is the latter reason that I received some displeased glances.

I’m usually the most quiet person in a room, but every now and then I will harmlessly amuse myself at the expense of others.  On this day, every time I stopped at a display, I began pretend boxing and yelled “The year of the t-eye-gerrrr!” in my best falsetto voice reminiscent of the song from Rocky III.

Nobody else had any frigging idea what I was doing, and this served to make the situation more humorous for me.  Imagine standing in the middle of one of the most opulent casinos in the world, surrounded by polite observers of a conservatory display, and spotting a lone tall white guy in a knit cap and sunglasses shadowboxing and singing the theme to a bad movie in a high-pitched voice.

I guess you had to be there.

Anyway, Chinese New Year does not officially begin until February 14 of this year, which happens to coincide with Valentines Day, because it’s a well-established fact that St. Valentine had yellow fever and often made trips to Bangkok in order to procure cheap and willing prostitutes.

Can you imagine how overwhelmingly easy it would be to write a history book?  I mean, after the passing of a couple of generations, there would be no witnesses on hand to disprove anything you said.  You could pretty much put whatever you wanted in there, and after it was repeated often enough, it would become fact for all intents and purposes.  This is more or less the methodology of most religions.

I digress.

The display this year was more or less the same as last year … except that it was more “tigery” and less “oxy”. The big guy in the middle made a reappearance surrounded by his gold coins and the many red lanterns, but some of the water effects from years past were MIA.  The baby panda climbing the bamboo shoot and the large glowing floral tiger were interesting additions this year.

The check-in area was also decked out for the occasion.  The large crystal horse remains the main visual draw for the lobby, and several floral characters were erected behind the main check-in desk.

Even though the display was on the “usual” end and the buzz was missing a bit, I enjoyed being able to take in the exhibit at my leisure without having to fight the typical crowds.  I’ve been to so many consecutive Bellagio displays that I no longer expect to be “wowed”.  Rather, each iteration is like a familiar friend, and it’s a traditional way in which I have come to acknowledge each season.

Even though the conservatory itself is somewhat of the antithesis of Las Vegas, it remains a favorite attraction of mine.

Kudos to the curators for another job well done, and last but not least … Kung Hee Fat Choy.

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