Prude City
May 12, 2010
It looks like the era of topless pools in Las Vegas may be coming to an end.
Excerpt ” …. Hard Rock and Light Group — which operates the adult-only Liquid pool at Aria and the topless Bare at Mirage — each changed their minds about opening topless pools this season. Off-Strip, Green Valley Ranch Resort has also discontinued topless sunbathing at its pool, the Pond.
Light Group President Jodi Myers said one reason it decided against topless sunbathing at its new pool is because the no-party policy limits the club’s marketing. Phil Shalala, vice president of marketing at the Hard Rock, said they felt it was a gimmick that had run its course.
Gaming Control Board member Randall Sayre said regulators will work with Metro again this summer to conduct enforcement checks at pool parties.
“Both Metro and Gaming Control have an ongoing interest in these venues and continue that interest going into the new pool season,” Sayre said.
County officials last summer considered strengthening codes relating to European sunbathing and the definition of pool parties, but no action has been taken.”
Basically, Clark County has been so unfriendly toward topless pools, and Metro PD has been so aggressive in raiding these pools, that some properties no longer want to put up with the hassle of operating them.
Nice.
Now is the time for all of you out there to remember the slick commercials and ad campaigns you see for this town each and every day. Remember, this is “Sin City”. It is “Camp Vegas”. It’s the place where “What Happens Here, Stays Here”.
The problem is, not much happens here anymore than doesn’t happen elsewhere.
It’s somewhat of a shame, but at this point, Las Vegas is a town which is 90% hype and 10% substance. The list of things you can do here, but not in St. Louis, are dwindling by the year. You really have to be fairly dim to believe that “Vegas Baby!” offers appreciably more “sin” than does “Los Angeles Baby!” Hell, Portland, Oregon has more strip clubs per-capita than does Las Vegas, and the clubs in Oregon are generally more permissive as well.
Now, in the interest of full disclosure, I’ve never been a huge fan of the existing topless pools. In my opinion, they’ve always written a check that they could not cash. I’ve been to many an “adult” pool over the years, and I have usually been disappointed. While there has been some fapabble material at the pools on some visits, these occasions have been in the minority. More often than not, the topless women who inhabit the pools are of the slightly older “my husband thinks this is soooo edgy” variety, and the few young, attractive women in attendance tend to make the men feel like pervs for ogling them (which makes one wonder what they expected).
These pools have always been gimmicks that failed to deliver, but I don’t think they should go away. To the contrary, I think they should strictly enforce a male/8+ attractive female ratio, enforce a human/douchebag ratio, and give free admission and drinks to women who agree to proudly display their nipples. They should give all 9’s $20/hour, and 10’s $50/hour just to hang out. Were I to run a topless pool, you can bet your ass that it would be the best topless pool in town because I actually have ideas beyond “shove as many people into a water hole as possible and hope some chick takes off her top”.
Las Vegas Pool Sunbathers
I find it sad that our already tame topless pools are being watered down because they are too risque’.
Increasingly, when I hear people refer to this place as “Sin City”, my first response is always “What sin?”. The sin of false advertising? The sin of terrible traffic? The sin of 6:5 Blackjack? The sin of seamonkey genocide at the Fremont Hotel?
Seriously, I don’t get it.
Prostitution is illegal in Vegas, drugs are illegal in Vegas, nudity and alcohol in strip clubs is illegal in (most of) Vegas … so what does that leave? Gambling?
Gambling’s not a “sin”. It’s a game of chance. Chuck E. Cheese restaurants across the country allow children to plug quarters into games that allow them to try and win “tickets”. Many states have a lottery. Hell, what is insurance if not a gamble that the value you receive from the company will be greater than the premium you pay?
Games of chance, in and of themselves, are not sufficient for a city to lay claim to the “sin” label, yet in 2010 … this is exactly what Las Vegas is doing.
Whether you choose to continue gullibly believing this myth or not is up to you, but one thing appears to be a foregone conclusion:
If you want to stare at bronze boobs while lounging around the pool, Camp Vegas may no longer be the place for you.
Despite our multi-million dollar ads and slogans promoting our acceptance of vice, I’m not sure it ever really was.
Written by wrxrob on May 12, 2010 at 4:00 am
Right now would be a good time for Atlantic City, NJ to legalize pot, prostitution, and nude pools. They already have the resort infrastructure built. They could legalize massage parlors that offer “happy endings”. From what I read, that town is suffering worse than Las Vegas at this point. Imagine the tourist dollars that would flock to the east coast keeping that town afloat, after dealing with the deadly blows by table game legalization from Delaware and Pennsyltucky.
Over the past 7 years, on average, I have been twice per year. This year, the number will be zero, and your article is one of the many reasons. Surely, I’m not alone.
Written by mike_ch on May 12, 2010 at 4:23 am
I wouldn’t worry too much about it. If it goes that far, blame the nightclub management people.
Caesars Palace and at least one other casino had a “European Pool” for years and years. What happened is that the trendy hipster asses at these nightclub management joints with one-syllable names like Pure and Light were put in charge of these parts of the resort. Because apparently having the nightclubs and restaurant scenes just weren’t enough. The only thing these people know how to do is throw expensive, velvet rope parties that your ugly ass nor mine is invited to. These things then turn into Penn Station for prostitutes and drug dealers.
The problem isn’t topless pools, it’s “Rehab” and every other hotel in town trying to get it’s 5% of it’s pie. Women not wearing bras isn’t the element that’s creating problems, it’s the damn dance party DJ UNTS UNTS UNTS UNTS UNTS UNTS element.
But if you’re looking at getting out, public toplessness is legal everywhere by provincial law in Ontario, Canada.
Written by Disco Stu on May 12, 2010 at 5:01 am
where will all of the sausage roast now?
Written by Ron from Mi on May 12, 2010 at 5:18 am
If there ever was a true “sin” that describes Las Vegas…there is only one that fits..
Hypocrisy.
Too much hype, yet doing the opposite of what the civic and business folks in Vegas are advertising the town as: an adult playground with booze, topless pools, X-number of “gentlemen’s clubs,” ultra-lounge nightclubs, etc., etc., etc…..with the gambling.
False advertising is cool for thirty seconds to one minute: then when reality hits, the fooled get wise…
And no, “Camp Vegas” is NOT a great idea.
This is NOT a KOA Kampground.
(Well, except at Circus Circus……………)
Written by Just Cid on May 12, 2010 at 6:01 am
I pay to go to the “adult” pools not to look at the women there, but to avoid the hordes of screaming children at the regular pools.
Mandalay’s main pool is a nightmare. I saw less children at Disney World than I did in that wave pool.
Written by tully on May 12, 2010 at 11:47 am
So, you have pools for families with kids, and pools for the attractive, hipster crowd. Where are the pools for everyone else?
Yeah, I know—-nobody wants to see middle aged fat asses, male or female at the pool. But these folks’ money is as green as anyone else’s—if they want some relaxing pool time on vacation, they should be able to enjoy it.
Ballys maybe? Decent pool area, and they don’t seem to have installed the DJ and party set up like other places.
Written by CoolDave88 on May 12, 2010 at 5:39 pm
Hey Rex: Kind of pervy your taking these photos, what?
Written by LizzieGirl on May 12, 2010 at 6:00 pm
Moorea Beach at MB is great – as Just Cid pointed out, the primary reason to go there is because it’s clean and child free. Relatively DB free, and the bonus is I can enjoy the sun sans top. I would be seriously pissed if MB did away with it.
Written by Mark on May 12, 2010 at 6:20 pm
LizzieGirl – Your comment would be more useful with pictures and greatly appreciated as well. ;p
Written by astrobel on May 12, 2010 at 9:50 pm
There’s nothing “adult” about nudity. I will never understand what’s that big DEAL about being topless. Yes, I’m European and was brought up surrounded by topless people while on vacation BUT seriously … all that fuss you seem to make in America about it is absolutely bananas.
Written by J. Louise on May 13, 2010 at 12:22 am
Rex: Seems like THIS post has received the most undivided attention than any other recently!
Written by keith on May 13, 2010 at 11:31 pm
astrobel – you forget that this is the same country that overpanicked because we may/may not have seen Janet Jackson’s nipple for .38 seconds during the superbowl a few years ago. what took less than a second was replayed under fake outrage every 5 minutes on every media outlet for the next 2 weeks.
god forbid we see a nipple, but watching dead bodies over & over again after hurricane katrina or 9/11 was okay.
we’ve never gotten away from the puritanical roots of this country when nudity & sex are concerned. personally, i think it sucks too.
Written by coolpacific on May 13, 2010 at 11:35 pm
Just got back from a weekend in Vegas and noticed two decidedly negative trends:
1) Rex has outlined the first above. The problem with these pools is that they are having the life sucked out of them by the frat boy/nightclub crowd. They are bound to draw negative attention from the cops by virtue of their clientele. Which leads to my second point:
2) Vegas has lost it’s class to a large degree. Walk the strip at night and its wall-to-wall fucktard douches getting absolutely dismantled on $30 gimmicky yard glasses of cheap piss and panhandlers. After ten minutes I refused to walk out there with my wife and we ended up taking cabs and limos everywhere.
I like the idea of a party town, a true “Sin City”, but it needs to have class. Otherwise, its no different than some drunken mexican resort town.