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I returned to The Stratosphere, and this time I was very cautious not to ask for directions.  I almost got shot by security last time I did that.

The Strat is my new favorite place to play some good old-fashioned 21.

It’s one of the last places on The Strip to offer $5 3:2 … and let’s face it, that’s about as good as Blackjack gets south of Downtown anymore.

When I went inside, I noticed something that I missed the last few times I was in the Stratosphere.

Virtual Blackjack.

The machine was literally one row away from the “real” Blackjack tables, and I realized I had a decision to make.  Which dealer?  Real or virtual?

I had played with virtual dealers before, but only a few quick games of 3 Card Poker at Hooters.  I had not played virtual Blackjack before.  I walked up to the large video screen, saw the decent looking electro-chick, and immediately bought in.  In case you were wondering, the 3 card Hooters chick was hotter, but I wouldn’t refuse full service from the Strat e-chick.

A big plus for the virtual dealers is that they will always be hot females.   They are not going to stick a 60 (or even 40) year old woman in support hose on those video screens.  Frankly, I think a huge draw would be virtual “Strip Blackjack”.  I’ve been talking about the necessity to raunch things up for awhile, and I still believe that is our only salvation.  In my scenario, anytime you get a natural 21, the video dealer loses the top.  If two people get naturals, then she loses the clothing altogether.  Hell, I might give up the 3:2 and willingly settle for 6:5 if she did that.  At least give me something for my odds loss.

Since they aren’t real people, I’m not even sure if they would need a license to do such a thing … and make no mistake, those tables would be full.  Seriously, they should make it happen.

Anyway, I played the virtual table for about half an hour, and it was cool, but I wasn’t doing well.  The hands came pretty fast and furious, and I was down a solid 25% when I picked up and walked over to a “real” table.

I bought in at the felt table, and proceeded to play for another half hour there.  I’m not going to bore you with a hand-by-hand account of my Blackjack session, but suffice to say I made up for some of my loss … including splitting tens once against a dealer 6.

I got an ace on one, a face on the other, and won both hands … so if you don’t like the play …. bite me, it’s my cash.  I didn’t get yelled at this time either, because the dealer ended up busting and the whole table won.

All told, I left the Stratosphere with about 10% less than I went in with, but it certainly could have been worse.

It was also my first time ever playing virtual Blackjack and live dealer Blackjack “back-to-back”, and during the trip home, it gave me a point on which to reflect.

Which is better?  What are the benefits and drawbacks to each?

Certainly virtual dealers will become more ubiquitous in the future. After my experiences playing virtual poker tables at the Excalibur, and now seeing other games go virtual, I can’t help but wonder how far in this direction we are going to move.

There are some definite benefits of the video dealers to the casino.

First and foremost the video dealers are cheaper for the house.

Video dealers don’t require health benefits.  Hell, they don’t even get sick.  Neither do their video children.  They are never late for work, their cars never break down, and they don’t fart and blame it on a co-worker, thus causing catfights in the break room.  The video women are much lower maintenance.  They do what their programmers tell them to do, or they get the plug pulled on them.  If only all women were video women, the world would be a perfect place.

Also, the casino doesn’t have dealers standing around doing nothing at empty tables, as I witnessed at The Strat this very day.

It’s also kind of nice playing the video tables because I don’t have a pit boss staring me down every three minutes.    There is something about being 6′3” with shoulder-length hair that causes me to get the hairy eyeball every time I play in a pit where the boss is not familiar with me.  It’s almost as though they think I am going to fire up a joint at the table or something.

Of course, this is ridiculous.  Pot impairs memory, the only thing I smoke at a Blackjack table is crack, so they have absolutely nothing to worry about.

In all seriousness, the pit dudes seem to be a little on edge lately.  I don’t know if they are being pressured to produce more profitable tables, or if they are just cranky, but surliness seems to be just as common as friendliness these days.  On this point, score one for the video dealers.

Of course, one of the main benefits of video dealers for the player is the lack of tipping.  Since human dealers are my neighbors (in a general sense), I tend to feel obligated to tip decently.  If I get two Blackjacks in a row, I feel like a deadbeat unless I roll a fiver to the dealer.  If I get two Blackjacks in a row with a video dealer, it’s all mine.  Screw etiquette, my tips are my tips when the dealer isn’t real.  Also, there are no misdeals.  You can’t be accused of counting cards, you can’t be accused of peeking at the hole card, and they never have to stop and go back to the camera for a replay when the dealer misreads your hand and thinks her 18 beat your 19.

Of course, there are benefits of human dealers that video dealers will never be able to replicate. You get conversation at the felt tables. I’m not completely sure why, but people tend not to talk at video machines.  This is also true of the Excalibur Poker tables. I’ve always noticed that people are far more silent in general when they are gathered around playing video games … even with other humans.  It’s obviously a psychological phenomenon.

A good dealer with a good personality can be invaluable to a Vegas card game.  You get a real human smile, you get to hear stories, they give you a hand job if you stand on soft 17 (Don’t believe me?  Just ask next time!),  and drink service is far better at felt tables.   If you play big, you will also be able to negotiate far better comps with the pit too.  Dealers and the pit recognize and greet you if you are a regular, which is something the video lady will never do.

The tactile nature of the felt table is ingrained in the psyche of gamblers, and it’s a huge part of the gambling experience.  Then again, so were coin hoppers, but everyone has now fully assimilated to TITO. And Jermaine.  And Jackie.

Anyway, after thinking it over, I came to no definitive conclusion.  I was split.  I suppose it really depends on the person and their mood.

Much like TITO, though, the choice may not even exist ten or twenty years from now.  Or it may only exist in the high roller rooms or at high limits.

There is a very real possibility that these machines could replace human dealers on some scale.  It will take some time, and won’t be a real issue for awhile, but I’ve already mentally prepared for it on some level.

There is one thing the virtual dealers will never have, though.

The enthusiasm and attitude of this wheel spinner at The Strat.

Frankly, I wish I had these kinds of dealers every time I played.

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